Rejection

its been six weeks since I formally began my job search after graduating from Flatiron. Six weeks of applying for developer positions with very little success. Most of the responses I receive back are just automated rejection notices. I did manage to successfully get one interview but the door to that job closed almost as fast as it opened. I don’t know what I hope to gain by writing this out, but maybe putting my thoughts on the matter out somewhere will prove to be cathartic in some sort of way.

I’ve never been a person that has handled rejection or failure well. The fear of these things have kept me from doing a lot in my life. And the way I’m feeling this week, has really confirmed to me why I that is the case. It feels like I’ve hit a wall in my progress. During the curriculum at Flatiron any time I hit a wall, I could get past it by doing research or learning a new skill. But, with this job search it feels different. Its hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel and sometimes its easy to doubt that there is one. Jumping into this career field has without a doubt been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I thought getting through the school section meant that it was going to get easier, but if anything its gotten more difficult. More difficult to keep my head straight, and keep my confidence up.

By no means am I quitting or giving up. However, the stress of the situation is definitely getting to me. The only thing, I can think to do is to keep hammering away. I can only control so much. I need to stayed focused and press forward. This is definitely a much longer journey than I anticipated, but I’ll get there……..eventually!